I Love You.
I really didn't even see it coming. All i could think is "God, i don't think i have treated you anywhere good enough to deserve an I love you, already". But it felt really good.
I had caught myself from saying it acouple times. I felt like i didn't want to be the one to say it first and scare the other person away. I guess i just wanted to know he felt it to. I kept having a daydream of saying i love you and him turning to me and saying back "your a porn star, I'll never honestly love you".
It was something i was just starting to accept along with the fact that dating anyone good looking from Staten Island works those jealous fucks into a frenzy. Honestly the start of this relationship has shown me a new low for faggots as a whole.
How does dating a porn star make someone a whore? I don't understand it but that's all that this poor guy is hearing. Or is it maybe he got something you want? Possibly i got something you want? Either way does that deserve the label of being a whore? Why not just say... "I'm a stupid jealous fuck and i hope your relationship fails", i can understand that.
anyways...
But yeah, I love you changes alot. I'm trying to not be so jealous myself. If someone is willing to love me, and mean it and there shouldn't be jealousies behind that. There should be honesty and faith which are not 2 of my best traits but I'm taking it all day by day, and working my best at being as good as i can be to this guy. You know and if it doesn't work out for whatever reason, i just want a guy for once to look back and say "he was an amazing bf, it just didn't work". I'm tired of being a horror story in these peoples lives.
So from here on until this ends, i pledge my protection, my devotion and all of my heart. I love you, Anthony. ~ xoxo Your big bear.
Monday, December 8, 2008
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45 comments:
I'm happy to hear the good news. Best of luck to you both!
Hey, big guy, you deserve all the that love and more. The James that is lovable has always been there, you've just been holding his head under the water all this time. Even so, sometimes loving someone is less about them being some perfect lovable person and more about deciding that you're going to love them and looking for the best in them regardless.
congrats, jason! finally something good coming along the way.
That is so awesome, James! Have fun.
Congrats.
Also, props to you picking a Staten Island man. We need more love.
aww, :) reading this makes you feel so good
Hi, james, my best wishes.
a lot of things to say, but this is not the time. now it is the time to say I am happy for you and wish you all the best.
a big hug, kiddo,
Bruno.
Hey Shit for brains, All you really need is your brother! So well all else fails u got me. But hey good to hear shit is working out. Love ya bro
best of wishes on your latest romance!
That is so great! I am so proud of you for saying "fuck it" and jumping into the relationship with both feet. Life is too short to hold back your feelings for fear of rejection.
Relationships are tough so its great that you were able to get that out there and say it. Jealousy is a nasty bitch too.
Let me throw my good wishes in with the crowd! Congrats!
I hope you continue to be very happy, and remember not to ever take him for granted!
James, I'm happy for the both of you...good blog.
Hi James,
I have to say this post has put such a big smile on my face, I am so happy for you. This has to be the best post I've read here, I'm so glad things are going great for you. Stop doubting it, it's really happening and you deserve it. All the best.
T.
James:
I have never commented before but felt compelled after your last post. I have been reading this blog for sometime and as many folks here...pulling for you. Obviously you have brains, looks, and a big heart - finally someone penetrated the hurt to touch it... So let go of the past, grab hold of love - be Happy and never look back. All the best James - believe you deserve it!!
Congratulations James! I'm very happy for you! you deserve it and fuck the haters they're just jealous that you're hot and happy and in love and they're bitter and ugly
Awww, that's so sweet! See? He can see past all the stupid fuckbutts trying to bring you down! No matter how this turns out, I think he's going to be someone who will always be there for you.
Okay, back to being bitchy and sarcastic.
So from here on until this ends,...
Hey, let's try to have a little optimism! :)
Whore no more! [See, it rhymes.] Fuckin' great. And your comments on this post are some of the most mature, clear-headed that I've ever read from you. Plus there's no better way to spend the holidays than in a new relationship. Best wishes.
Wu Wu You are in love and that is awesome. It is amazing what the love a good man can do to ones outlook.
Let the haters hate and the jealousy subside and focus on the good stuff.
I'm happy for you, James, and I hope it works out.
But honestly, I'm still baffled by your obsession over what others think of you (and by extension, your boyfriend).
You are a public figure. Your name, your face, your dick and ass -- they are out there for all to see. That means some people are going to target you. Period.
It has nothing to do with you -- it has to do with fame. Ask Brad, Angie and Jennifer what it's like having their entire lives played out week after week on the magazines you see at your supermarket checkout. You have but a tiny sliver of their fame, yet it's the same syndrome.
People are always going to love/hate/disdain/envy/lust after you. Again -- it has nothing to do with the person you actually are. You're only a mirror of how they feel about themselves.
So stop worrying about them, for God's sake and your own. Live the best life you can. Be the best boyfriend you can.
The rest is just white noise.
I'm so confused by this post. My name isn't Anthony, it's William.
loser! saying i love you already?! LAME!
james you beast
congrats on the happiness and like i always say fuck the haters there plenty these days,
your man will understand that people are going to be jealous and hate on you
you got my number if you ever need anything
stay safe brother
Congratulations! Enjoy the good times that you spend with him. Don't let anyone take those away. They aren't worth the trouble.
I know you know how lucky you are, but I have to say I hope he knows how lucky he is.
I hope and wish nothing but the best for you both. I really would like to start a regular email based penpal kind of thing with you if you're in the market for a non-judgmental, understanding friend who isn't a "faggot" but a normal, laidback gay guy that avoids the scene.
You know how to get ahold of me...I hope you get ahold of me.
-Chris Brunette
I'm happy for you....hopefully, finally you can be with someone that can care about and like you for you and not for your name or your career.
Remember tho that as much I love reading your stories and what is going on with you in your life and career keep some things special and sacred to yourself regarding your relationship.
Best of luck to you both.
Best Wishes tough guy!
"Honestly the start of this relationship has shown me a new low for faggots as a whole."
I hear ya. You deserve to be happy. Don't let the sick fags out there get you down. It's best to just stay out of the queer areas of town and avoid those perverted freaks.
I wish I was as lucky as you to have someone tell me they love me. I wish you both nothing but the best !
im glad you're happy, i see it in your FB pics
but don't stop working hard now.
start this as level 2! Where can you go from here? make good choices, and keep yourself in check.
I'll hope for you,
jsut read my damn blog!!! you'd love the music riotriotriot.com
That is awesome James, good for you.
i give it a month
no offense
but
watch it happen
i love the name change a MUCH better fit than the previous one
I am happy for you. I kinda understand what your going through. I a big guy in Chicago with a 9 inch tool. I take good care of my body and mind, man. Most guys i meet want me to always deap fuck em. I will admit i am into leather and love tearing into a nice hole but it sucks when that's all they want. I have even fucked around with couples or dudes cheating on their boy friends or try to pick up guys like me. I hate to say this but gay guys can not be in faithful relationships, they are all too fucking horny all the time. I have tried a rlationship too in the past being a 37 yr old husky bear. It never works! I also remember all the pressure of being faithful and wanting more booty or dick inside mye muscular hole myself. I had to learn more about loving myself more and honesty. Now i have to learn to be happy to NOW be single. Since also being in so many relationsips, i love being single, doing whatever i want and fucking any hole in my way.
Thanks
Matt A.
mattadamsdietmanager@yahoo.com
You have eyes that make anyone want to look at you and take a double take. And then the emotions you let loose in the blogs is real and sad at times. Makes me wonder do you have any good friends who can relate to you?.
Wow, this is news! You're not so wrapped up in yourself anymore and seem to care more about someone else. Good job!
ANYWAYS.. outside my hatred of relationships (im kinfa like a hippy in a sense)
www.riotriotriot.com FOR THE NEW PENDULUM VIDEO!!!! just released today dude!!!
Happy Festivus,
Blessed 2009 for you too, cutie ;)
I would normally say that that last comment made me fucking sick, but I really think it was sweet. I'm happy for you and glad things are looking up for you. He sounds like and awesome guy.
Congratulations! Nothing makes a relationship more official than an "I Love You!".
Ignore those idiots trying to pull both of you down by calling your BF a whore, hope he does too! Poisonous words come from envious or feeble-minded people, and help no one.
Protect your relationship like a lion...as long as you're true to yourself...it's all that matters!
so, I know we dont really talk anymore... but I wanted to say congrats on finding happiness. I dont even know if you read these, but I just think it's about time and you deserve it.
Screw what everybody else says! It's all about you and being happy. If anthony makes you happy, then good for you.
Hope things go well and you and ant have a wonderful new year!
-eric
btw, Breathe Me is one of my favorite songs! For like years now... lol
Ive known Anthony since early H.S. (before he was really muscular lol) and I know hes a great guy. Hes always had haters because hes not exactly shy and dating a big name Falcon studio porn star just plays into it all. But I know hes used to treading though those waters cuz he has all his life and can handle it like a pro. LOL
Be good to him, he deserves it. And remember, relationships arent about how you get through the good times, but how you get through the bad ones. I wish you and Anthony the best!
PS: I better be invited to the wedding. Did someone say protein brownies instead of cake? =)
Dear Sir, Just listened to that song "stripped" on the main page. "visceral" is the only way I think I could describe. Also, May I venture to echo the sentiments of those contributors hereto in expressing my hope also that your new relationship is everything you want. Jonathan (from England)
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