I can take much more of LA.
I have been here over a week and i'm just over it. I have had way to much sex and i have done to much drugs to wanna be here anymore. I have had my fill and now its time to go home. I woke up this morning, well i'm not sure if i woke up or just opened my eyes after laying in bed for a couple hours hoping to fall asleep, but i the overwheleming feeling to just pack up and leave like i have over stayed my welcome. I mean tonight is my last night, but i am not in the mood to go out anymore and for once in a longtime am not in the mood to have sex, so with no urge for sex what is the point of going out? just to be around gay men, no thanks! Seriously, my dick is raw and my ass is beat the fuck up, oh, who know after i get a couple drinks in my my feeling might change.
Another reason its time to leave LA is my hotel is a fucking dump and i really dont wanna be in this piece of shit much longer than i have to. It's honestly one step away from being a bathhouse. There is dried cum all over the curtains and there is a sign on the door urging guests to make sure they lock the door before they go to sleep. Why you ask? Because you just might end up with a queer in your bed that you were not expecting. It was pretty unbelieveable that about 20 mins after checking in here, i had a knock at my door from some 18 year old kid asking me if i was looking for company? Of course, i said No.... well no at first. I got something to eat and when i came back the kid was still floating around the hotel so i took him up on his offer and used his mouth as my own personal fuck hole. I just can't help to think anyone that hangs around these seedy places, is looking to be treated like a piece of shit. Cuz i mean that how i treated him and he seemed like he couldnt be happier. Well, i was also in a rush because i had my date and i needed to get ready. So i pumped and dumped his face and quickly got ready cuz my dates was going to be picking me up soon.
I'm not sure if you could call it a date as much as you can call it revenge. Revenge on my current Ex. Jesus, victory tastes so fucking sweet. Oh yeah, people were used and the date was one of the best jobs i have ever done acting. But it played out exactly how i wanted. To be 100 percent serious, going on this revenge date was the only reason i extended my trip. I wish i could go into more detail, cuz the details will only make my thrill that much more intense, but i'm a sucker and i actually like the guy i went on the date with. Not as a Bf kinda way cuz the guy is a total player, but he seemed like good people and i dont want my craziness to effect a possible friendship. You know, i have done my best at getting over my ex and i still do find myself getting upset over things i shouldnt be anymore, but this was one of the things that kept playing in my head over and over after we broke up. I was obcessing over it. But thanks to my utter insanity toward this obcession, it will not be an issue anymore. This was kinda like therepy for a crazy person. Its nice to know that i win. i win. i win. i win.
Saturday, March 8, 2008
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32 comments:
So why don't you just get up and leave? Go home a day early.
chic.
i feel sorry for the guys that come on here and write almost a novel giving you really good advice,praise and love.
almost every post starts with you telling of your drug/alcohol induced stuper. you're not taking anyones advice on anything.
at least lie about what you're up too or something like most drug addicts do. lol.its so insulting to the people that care about you.
okay okay okay, no i was not doing drugs. We were pretending sugar straws were coke, and 7-up was G.
Plus, i would never abuse my perscriptions. Xanex and Vikes are not something to be playd with!
So to any of the LA folk that saw me looking retarded at whatever shithole i was at, that was just me getting over my Jetlag. The three hour time difference can be brutal.
What's the name of the hotel you stayed in LA? I know it sounds tempting but I think I'll avoid that one.
I don't get it (and it's ok), if you really doesn't give a shit about your current ex, what's with the "revenge"? Cause on some level it sounds like you still care about him. You can still screw and pumped by as many guys as possible but I'm not sure where "revenge" comes from.
sngarey, why should Erik be like any other drug addicts - lie? He's been genuine and it's up to him to decide if he wants to take advice. Perhaps he's taking tiny piece at a time that you don't even notice.
that's what i like to hear!
No jimmy there no emotions for my ex anymore. Do i sit there and think about how thing could have been different? yes. But as far as my revenge goes, it was to more or less prove a point. It was also something that was stuck in my head and until i did something about it, it wasnt going to go away. So maybe its not even revenge but me just dealing with my issues in a fucked up kinda way.
Either way it feels good, it felt good and it might actually feel just as good tonight when i say goodbye.
last thing i will say about this is "i told you so"
Wow that 18 year old kid coming around, sounded like a porno I've seen before. He didn't demand money did he? lol have a safe flight back to NYC. It's really cold and it's snowing like crazy.
Staying at the San Vicente?
Hope you keep the "Feel good" vibe when you're back in NY.
People have different ways to deal with different issues. As long as the way you deal with it doesn't cause you any harm (physically), go ahead. I'm not promoting deal things in fucked up way to be honest, but sometimes it may turns out to be good at the end.
Your right Jack, i guess you been here?
I almost tempted to stay at San Vicente, but I heard it's filthy and breaking apart so that's why I've been staying at hostel near WeHo (on Melrose + Fairfax) when I'm in LA.
Besides I'm fucking cheap on accomodation
seedy hotel for a seedy person in a seedy profession.
So, now what Erik? Revenge is a dish best served cold...
Well i'm gonna go out again tonight with the guy the revenge was focused around. I think he is a cool guy. I already got what i wanted out of the situation, now its jut fun.
Marge Simpsons' 'hmmmmmmmmmmmmm'
Sngarey is giving you the wrong advice; Those who really care for you do not need you to lie about you using drugs. Unfortunately it is not up to us poor idiots who are thinking to know the real you through what you write on this blog and from what we want to see in the occasions we see you in some interview at some award ceremony, to demand you listen to our advices. You are not a teenager anylonger, you are a grown man with your own will and dependance on alcohol and probably drugs. So we only can write these comments to you and feel better , hoping that at least a drop will penetrate into your thick skull.
I really believe all our words will have no real effect but as they say, hope is the last thing that escaped from pandora box.
And we still wish you the best, kiddo. Bruno
Jesus Erik, I just looked up the San Vicente website. Even it, makes it look like a dump. I love the pictures of the 'guests'. WHAT were you thinking???lol
"This was kinda like therepy for a crazy person. Its nice to know that i win. i win. i win. i win."
for pete's sake,how old are you?
not to be rude,but before you actually post your thoughts...READ OVER AND PONDER what you're putting out there.
you win?how do you win when you're the type of person who let's someone get on top of you and fuck you in your sleep.
to be honest with you...this anger comes out of concern.mutherfucker,the way you describe the shitty bathhouse perfectly matches your life if you're gonna let someone rape you and afterwards you fuck that boys mouth and give off the message that he indeed is a slut and can be no better.damn this shit is crazy.
so you say you're the picky type....fuck boy,get real - the way you're messing with your life,all it could currenly take for me to get you into bed is have you drugged and get on top of you when you're passed out.
as for stinky dick...it currently mirrors the filth YOU ALLOW to let clog in your life.so don't look down on him...
people give a shit about you...all you do is shit on them in return...it's so crazy...lol
oh my god! i cant believe you fucked some guy before a date! bet it really took the pressure off. just one of the many reasons why you fucking rule! you should write a dating book and put that in there: "always get a blow job before a revenge date."
why u stayin there???
dont the honchos pay u much.
weird.
maybe, i hope, ur pullin a bukowski and jes writing a good yarn.
stayed at the vicente once: a ff convention was in progress and was so grossed by the open nastys. sad old men torturing each other.
ur gonna stay depressed u poor lil thang till u quit that sorry life.
make ur momma proud!
do u ever tire of ur cynicism?
maybe uve wallowed in ur sadness enuf. maybe not.
git healthy and the rest follows:transformation in an instant my son.
oxo
"Wet Palms" was filmed there; I practically lived there when we were shooting 2004-05.
Falcon put you up there? I can't fucking believe that. It could very well be the nastiest hotel in the entire world.
But -- I have to admit -- there was something convenient about being able to get up in the middle of the night, get a blowjob, and then go back to your room and go back to sleep.
I have checked the San Vincente Hotel web site.
"The ONE and ONLY gay resort in Los Angeles!"
What? Que? Was? Che? eh???
Gay resort? since when one goes to a "gay resort" when visiting a town? going to a normal hotel is not considered? is it too difficult to be oneself in a "normal" hotel?
In the heterosexual world, and checking the (horrible) pics, this gay "resort" looks like equivalent to a "brothel" or a "erotic club for couple exchange" (or something similar - whatever they call it).
Sorry, I don't get it.
Oh my god that is hilarious! Have you ever thought about writing for a living?
DC- he'd have to learn to spell first!
His blogs are always rife with typos, spelling mistakes and shitty grammar, it does my head in, especially when using such an easily edit-able medium.
Poor sentence structure aside ;P hehe, its always a very entertaining read, atleast after ive managed to translate it XD
"so with no urge for sex what is the point of going out? just to be around gay men, no thanks!"
This really cracked me up because it strikes to a core truth. We of us actually respects other fags or even wants to be around them? As an African-American I have it twice as bad having to deal with niggers.
I can tolerate fags if I am super horny and want a piece of ass. But otherwise they really disgust me. I love reading your blog because you say it like it is without worrying about the politically correct fag patrol. Good luck with your cruising dude.
I just had a look on Trip Advisor at the San Vicente Inn and it sounds like the worst hotel since the Bates Motel!!
http://www.tripadvisor.com/Hotel_Review-g33252-d119453-Reviews-San_Vicente_Inn-West_Hollywood_California.html
But keeping to the movie theme, this last post was a bit Glenn Close from Fatal Attraction. Have you boiled any bunnies lately? Have you had your hair redone as a fright perm? We want to know!!
I think you should add up these post and make a book out of it.
Call it: "Memoirs of a...Fuck it, It Doesn't Need a goddamn Title" by Erik Rhodes.
Chapter 1: Cum drenched curtains
lol
I just have to say I've been too shy to comment on your blog but I have been lurking. You have a nautral story telling talent, and your honestly is refreshing. Your blog is so riveting, and you seem very complex (in a good way). I read the post about you on G and people potentially taking advantage of you, and that's really disturbing. Guess that's some of the perks that comes with being a celebrity. =P But I do wish you all the best in your search for your self and for 'the one'.
you guys have GOT to leave erik alone. neither you or myself know him on a level that he would listen to our 'advice' or concerns. you have got to get over yourselves. i mean it's a blog an online journal in which he vents his frustrations not a group therapy meeting where you are all people. his writing is the only authentic thing on here we are, all of us, nothing more than Screennames and little digital thumbnail pictures. most of your comments aren't even concern or advice but your thinly veiled transference. or in other cases the most ludicrous case of schadenfreude. get over it. as for erik hope your doing well what with the recent shit that's gone down with you. hope shit gets better and ignore, as you obviously are, these bitches.
I know what the revenge was :) and it was sweet and fun. Erik you're a class act all the way. Have a safe trip back to NYC.
http://queeristan.wordpress.com/2008/03/09/erik-rhodes-in-ex-wars/
This message is for Eric Rhodes and everyone else that might be struggling with whatever (since their are so-o-o many vices out there.)
I know it can be difficult to recover from past mistakes; I'm trying to do some of that myself right now. I used to allow myself to be defined by others; even allowing them to speak for me as though I needed to be validated. I am so over that now and unfortunately, too many people, including family members, can't take it because far too many feel alone, insignificant, inadequate, inferior, etc. The saying goes "Misery loves company." I disagree because if misery knew anything about Love (true love-of one's own existence and then those that are around you) it would no longer be misery. I think its a sad state of affairs when those that say they love you (family and friends) act and speak as though they don't want to see you use the wings Life/God/Existence gave you because it may mean that you end up flying a little higher (and not on drugs but life) than them (once again they think this only because of their own insecurities.) Anyone that takes you down has to go down with you. Anyone that lifts you up has to be lifted up also. Everyone Wins. I win and so do you Eric Rhodes, my main man. KEEP BELIEVING IN THE HOPES THAT ARE CONNECTED TO YOUR TRUE LOVE (WHAT'S IN YOUR HEART BABY?)
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